What I Know Now About Love, Loving (and Leaving)

I’m probably not the right person to discuss this since I don’t really have much of a track record when it comes to love. I have never really been active in dating.

I only seriously dated two guys (!) and the rest didn’t have that spark (parang Meralco lang). ๐Ÿ™‚

But it’s my parents’ wedding anniversary today (48 years!) so indulge me. And maybe I can write about love because of what I’ve been through. Maybe. ๐Ÿ™‚

Love is a difficult thing. Two people from different backgrounds with different values getting together can be disastrous. But it can also be rewarding if the two work it out.

1. Have a strong sense of self.
I never subscribed to the idea of getting into a relationship during high school and college years. I believe that one must have a solid strong sense of self before entering a relationship. This means knowing what you want and don’t want, what you are willing to sacrifice and compromise, and what kind of treatment you deserve.

Of course, this is one lesson I’m still trying to learn. I’m a work in progress.

2. Everything happens because it needs to happen.
I wasted many years with someone because I thought it was the right thing to do. Dad once said, “Bakit sya pa? Ang dami mo namang nagiging kaklase sa college.” But I’ve learned not to question why things happen. I just have faith that everything happens because it was meant to be.

3. Whoever is meant for you will not pass you by.
I have seen this personally that’s why I know that it’s true. Whoever is meant for you (a friend, a partner, etc) to meet will not pass you by. They may not stay in your life forever but they have something to teach you. This leads me to my next lesson:

4. It’s okay to leave.
Someone once told me that he has never met someone who can give up relationships so easily like me. I was hurt when he told me that but I realized that it is indeed true. Leaving bad relationships (and I mean, any kind of relationship) is not easy for me but I can do it when needed (and I’ve done this many times).

I don’t believe in staying in toxic relationships. These can zap your spirit and make you lose respect of yourself and the other person. Of all the relationships I severed, not once did I regret ending it.

5. Everything will be okay.
And just because you left a relationship doesn’t mean life ends, too. On the contrary, the ending of a relationship allows you to start a new life again. I am a living testament to this and I’m immensely grateful to God for allowing me another chance at happiness.

At the end of the day, your happiness is what’s important. Nothing more and nothing less.