Keep Your Mouth Shut

I used to love You’ve Got Mail until I finally acknowledged that the movie centers on two stories of cheating and infidelity. 🙂

My favorite line in that movie is this:

I would have asked for your number, and I wouldn’t have been able to wait twenty-four hours before calling you and saying, “Hey, how about… oh, how about some coffee or, you know, drinks or dinner or a movie… for as long as we both shall live?

But there are two other lines that I love:

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if I could pass all my zingers to you? And then I would never behave badly and you could behave badly all the time, and we’d both be happy. But then, on the other hand, I must warn you that when you finally have the pleasure of saying the thing you mean to say at the moment you mean to say it, remorse inevitably follows.


And as I waited, someone else showed up: a man who has made my professional life a misery. And an amazing thing happened. I was able, for the first time in my life to say the exact thing I wanted to say at the exact moment I wanted to say it. And, of course, afterwards, I felt terrible, just as you said I would. I was cruel, and I’m never cruel. And even though I can hardly believe what I said mattered to this man – to him, I am just a bug to be crushed. 

These two quotes say a lot about a person’s character. Sure, it’s tempting to lash out and say nasty things to people who have caused you great pain (mistresses, cheaters, infidels, etc) but what benefit will lashing out give you?

For a few minutes, you’ll feel great for speaking your mind. You probably would pat yourself in the back for standing up for yourself. But what’s next?

If you think about it, giving in to your anger would only allow yourself to be even angrier. Those few seconds of saying hurtful words would only feed whatever hatred you have in your heart.

Don’t give it to the temptation. Be the bigger woman in all this. Sure, someone may have hurt you deeply and immensely but think of the kind of person you’ve become after going through that ordeal. You’ve been blessed immeasurably and there’s no reason for you to go back and relive that past.

So, keep your mouth shut and just keep moving on. That is the best revenge.